Cold As You
by mjp248
Summary: Brucas. Sad Brucas. A little while down the road when they confront everything that happeneed between them. Based on Sophia's commentary speech. This boy she loves so much just doesn't know her. One Shot.


Hello Everyone! This is a one shot. Basically, it based around what Sophia said in the commentary, about how Brooke sees that the boy she loves so much just doesn't know her. This is that... love Brucas... but here you go...

Michelley P.

* * *

Cold As You

_You have a way of coming easily to me_

_and when you take, you take the very best of me_

_so I start a fight cause I need to feel something_

_and you do what you want cause I'm not what you wanted_

She slid the tips of her fingers over the black door where the harsh rain drops swam over it, closing her eyes tight to remember when it once stood out bright red, just for her. There was so much hanging in the air that night, coming down with the rain, as she knocking gently on the door. There was discomfort, but so much love in this place. Lucas swung open the door and scratched his sleepy head, confused to see her standing there, dripping wet. She nudged him with her shoulder as she made her way in past him. Standing in the middle of the room, in just the faint glow of his bedside lamp, she shook her arms to let the raindrops slide off of her shirt. She stared at him, he looked different.

"What's going on Brooke?" He said with concern as he wrapped a wool blanket around her shoulders. His finger tips breezed over her wet neck as he pulled the blanket tight around her, holding his hands on her shoulders for a little while too long. She gave him an appreciative smile and stepped back, afraid to be touch by him for any longer. A raindrop fell out of her hair and rolled down her face and Lucas reached out to wipe it off her chin. She flinched under his touch.

"Brooke?" He asked again. He gave her a small sad smile. He couldn't help but think about how absolutely amazing she looked. Her hair was soaked and hanging loosely over her shoulders. Her dark burgundy t shirt clung to her, revealing curves that he knew so well. She was shivering so once more, he reached out and ran his hands rapidly over her arms to warm her up. "What are you doing out in this weather? At this time!" He smiled. He glanced over at the clock. Next to his bed.

"It's only 3:00am, doesn't everyone stay out this late on Fridays?" She joked. He laughed and shook his head.

"Not in this weather." He smiled. She couldn't believe how much he was smiling, more than she had ever seen him smile in years. She couldn't help but wonder if she had been the one to bring him down in that time.

"My car broke down..." She explained. "It was cold and your house was closest." She nodded, as if this was the most logical thing in the world.

"Oh..." He whispered. He seemed disappointed as if he wanted her to say something like, _'I needed to see you Lucas!' _But she resisted. She stood in front of him and watched as he tried to hide how nervously his hands were shaking. "Why were you out this late, when it's raining so hard?" He asked as he sat on the edge of his bed and sat on his hands.

She shrugged and smiled, "I always liked the rain... and I couldn't sleep." She explained.

"Me too..." He smiled back. He bit his lip and couldn't tear his eye from her. "But what were you doing on this side of town?" He asked dumbly. _Driving by just to see if your light was on. _She felt like admitted, but instead she shrugged and changed the subject.

"How are you and Peyton?" She asked nervously. Why she wanted to know, she wasn't sure. But she asked anyways, secretly hoping he'd say not good.

"Great..." He glowed. She held her breath for a second, afraid that the lump in her throat would surface. "She said that you guys are getting along well now..." He added.

Brooke nodded and turned away from him, squeezing her eyes tight to hold in the tears. She couldn't help but let out a small whimper. And Lucas noticed right away.

"Brooke?" He spoke her name in the way he always did, so soft and sweet. "Are you crying?" He had so much concern in his voice that it overwhelmed her, causing her to let out a sharp breath.

"No..." She whined. Lucas had to laugh a little at how oblivious she thought he was. He would have known if she hadn't been here that she had been crying that night. He would have felt it

"Brooke... come on, what's wrong?" He asked. He stood up and pulled her into a hug to comfort her, not realizing how hard that would be for both of them. There were so many unanswered questions between them. How the other felt. Who wanted who. Who was happy now. Because Brooke knew it wasn't her.

_Oh what a shame, what a rainy ending to a perfect day_

_just walk away, ain't no use defending words that you will never say_

_and now that I'm sitting here thinking it through_

_I've never been anywhere cold as you_

"Do you love her?" Brooke asked. Lucas stepped back and turned away from her. He didn't think she really had the right to ask that. After everything he'd been through, he couldn't help but still be a little angry for making him go through it all.

"Of course!" He snapped angrily. They were both trying their best to keep their voices down, in order to not wake Lucas's mother or baby brother. Brooke raised her eyebrows at him, she didn't understand why he was getting so defensive.

"It was just a question!" She said, just as angry at him as he was at her. Neither knew why the other was so angry, but the anger towards each other was boiling over, all building up in the small room.

"And it's none of your business..." He whispered coldly. She put her hands on her hips, causing the blanket to fall in the floor around her feet.

"Oh, but I think it is!" She spat out. "It would be nice to know how you feel about the person you chose over me!" She regretted the words as soon as they escaped her mouth. She dropped her head and tried to calm herself down. Her and Peyton had been getting along so well, she didn't even realize that she had still been hanging onto this, after ten months of trying to get over it.

"You're kidding me!" He whispered as loudly as he could. "_You_ left _me_!" He justified for her. She nodded and pressed her lips together in order to keep her sobs in. "You never even gave me a real reason. And now, after nine months..."

"Ten months." She corrected him. "And four days. And six hours." She said specifically.

He was surprised at first. Then it hurt him to realize how hard she was clinging to the past. "Now... after all that time, you show up on my doorstep in the middle of the night." She nodded agreeing with him. She was stupid to have thought about taking refuge here. She should have known it would cause problems.

"I know... I didn't give you a reason." She took a huge breath and tried to regain her composure.

"Can you give me one now?" He said calmly. She stared at him, a reason? There were so many that were undescribable. Like, because he never really saw her for who she was. And he always had his head caught in someone else's problems and he never once understood how much she needed him. And, because he never needed her as much as she needed him.

"What's my favorite color?" She said randomly. He choked on his words for a second, not sure what this had to do with what they were talking about.

"What? Brooke..." He staggered.

"You don't know do you?" She said with a small disappointed chuckle. He just shook his head.

"What's my favorite show?" She quizzed him again.

"Sex and the City?" He said with a smirk. She didn't find this amusing at all. She crossed her arms in front of her and stared at him coldly. She let out a cold breath and Lucas noticed her bottom lip beginning to quiver.

"Brooke... I don't see what this has to do with anything." He admitted.

"Did you know I had a little brother, he died when he was three." She blurted out. It was the first time she ever told anyone that. She had been young herself when it happened, just before she moved to Tree Hill.

"I didn't..."

"Did you know that I've been miserable for the past ten months?" She said in a higher voice.

"No, I didn't." He finally choked out. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"You didn't ask." She shrugged.

_You put up walls and paint them all a shade of gray_

_and I stood there loving you and wished them all away_

_and you come away with a great little story_

_of a mess of a dreamer with the nerve to adore you_

"I think I should go..." Brooke whispered.

"No!" He stopped her. He jumped in front of the door just as she got ready to reach for the handle. Their bodies practically collided and shivers went through both of them as their skin touched. "We need to talk about this." He whispered.

"There's nothing left to talk about." She whispered back. He leaned down and couldn't help but take in the sweet scent of her hair.

"If you were so miserable... why did you break up with me in the first place?"

She stepped back and stared up at him. There was a distance in his eyes, that she had never noticed before. But as he spoke so professionally and so sweetly, she couldn't help but wonder if this was all an act to him, or if he really _really _wanted to know.

"You were never there." She said simply. His face didn't drop at first, and he didn't try to argue. But looking at him now, so many of those unanswered questions got answered. She realized that this _boy, _that she loved so much, he just didn't know her. She could have fought for it. She could have made him see her for her, but that wasn't what she wanted. She wanted someone who could look at her face and read her mind. She wanted someone who'd be able to reach into her and grasp all of her emotions, and settle them. For the first time in ten months it hit her, he wasn't it.

Lucas stared at Brooke. As they stood so close together, so overwhelmed by one another, he knew she was right. He had never seen how miserable she was. He didn't once understand how much he stretched and strained her until she was at the end of her rope. He never _once _tried to help her up when she fell. He could see the pain in her face, and for the first time since he and Peyton had been together, he wished that there was something he could say to turn back time. Not to erase choosing Peyton, but to erase everything he put Brooke through.

_You never did give a damn thing honey but I cried, cried for you_

_and I know you wouldn't have told nobody if I died, died for you_

_Died for you..._

He became so mesmerized with her, that he didn't even feel himself lean down to her face. He slowly closed his eyes as Brooke kept her's open in shock. For so long she had waited to kiss him again, just to be with him. But as he slid his hands around her waist, it just didn't feel right anymore. It wasn't that this wasn't what she wanted, but the timing and the circumstances were all wrong. She stepped to a side and made him open his eyes in shock. Brooke Davis has just turned him down.

The thunder rolled outside and the rain smashed on the roof harder than before. "You just don't get it do you?" She said in shock. He stood up straight and looked at her, finally shaking his head, no. No.

"No!" He shouted. He lowered his voice again, when realizing that it wasn't only them in the world now. "No, I don't get it. You come over here in the middle of the night, looking like _that..._" He said biting his lip when he once more took in how beautiful she looked. She blushed and couldn't help but smile a little. Even when she was soaking wet, her make up was smudged and her hair was a mess, he thought she was beautiful. "You go and act all vulnerable and when I try to kiss you... you turn away. What the hell do you want?"

She stood there with her mouth gaped open in shock. "This was _not_ a plot! I came here because my car broke down and when I thought about somewhere safe to go in this storm. I thought about you. But I was _so _wrong about you." She concluded. "You're not what I needed. The old Lucas was what I needed. You're not that person anymore." She smiled sadly and pushed him to aside. She stared back at him for a second, searching for a glimpse of the old him, just to hang onto. But there it was again, that look that told her that no matter how much she loved this _boy, _he would never really know her.

_Oh what a shame what a rainy ending to a perfect day _

_Oh every smile you fake is so condescending_

_counting all the scars you made_

_and now that I'm sitting here thinking it through_

_I've never been anywhere cold as you_

She gave him a small smile, and reached for the doorknob. He didn't stop her, but she knew this Lucas wouldn't. The old Lucas, would have ran out in the rain when she was angry at him just to declare how much she meant to him. She wanted to tell him that she couldn't wait around forever for him to figure out what he wanted, and that she wouldn't wait for him to be who he really was. Unless, _this_ was who he really was. If so, she wouldn't wait at all. But she looked him in the eye and slowly pulled the door open, letting a cold wind wash through the heated room. And she knew that no matter where she went she'd never feel a coldness such as this again.

* * *

There ya go? Wa Ya think? let me know! 

Michelley P.


End file.
